drsquidlove: (Default)
[personal profile] drsquidlove
Snail Tale
by Dr Squidlove
drsquidlove@livejournal.com

No archiving, thank you.

Riley catches up with Xander, and it turns out there's some important catching-up to do.

Xander/Riley, mild angst

Written for [livejournal.com profile] allyndra for the minor characters round of [livejournal.com profile] maleslashminis. She wanted Xander/Riley, a crossbow, wonder, a joke.

(I just kind of pretended Riley never married Sam. Sorry, Sam.)

Post-Chosen.
Rated G. Nothing to warn for.

Wordcount: 1649

Feedback always welcome.

Xander, Riley and all the Buffy world are property of Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy.

Snail Tale

Xander looked out the motel room's peephole, and then looked again, and threw the door open. "Riley? What the hell are you doing here?"

"Looking for you."

"Me?"

Riley gave him that 'you're a crazy man' look. "Well, any of you, but you were the first to show up on the radar, so, Xander - what the hell happened in Sunnydale?"

Oh. Shit. They hadn't told Riley.

"Where is everyone? I got back from Quilaco and it turns out the place is a crater and it's the army's best guess that you're all buried down there. I've had flags up everywhere looking for any of you, and there's been nothing for three months, until Alexander Harris shows up flying Cleveland to Oregon."

"I can't be the only Alexander Harris on a plane these days."

"You're the only one who checked a crossbow."

"Oh. Right." Suddenly Xander realised they were still standing in the doorway, so he pulled the crucifix out of his back pocket and tossed it to him.

Riley caught it and waved his not-smoking hand, and Xander backed up to let him in.

"What the hell are you doing in Portland?"

"There was a news story- which doesn't matter. Giles thought there might be a new slayer here, so I came to check it out." Xander dropped on his bed and that's when he saw how sickened Riley looked.

"New slayer," Riley choked out. "You didn't... How could you not-"

"No, not - Buffy's fine."

It would have been comical to watch the relief, if Xander hadn't understood how he felt. Then his face fell again. "Faith."

"No- Look, this is going to be a long one. Pull up a bed." Xander gestured at the other mattress, waited for Riley to sit down.

He did, like his legs just gave out from under him. "I'm guessing this all comes down to another apocalypse."

'Another apocalypse' wasn't enough to describe what happened in May. "We need a new word for apocalyptic." Xander tried to explain the bullet points, the return of Spike and the first evil and Giles delivering all the potentials and the Turok-Han and the Hellmouth all over again.

In the end, it all boiled down to "Anyway, Willow went all white magic, and now it's less of a 'one girl in all the world', and more of a 'collect the whole set'."

"How many?"

Xander shrugged. That was the question that had had them arguing every night they had the energy to bother. "We don't know. There might have been records at the Council to give us an idea, but that's gone. Maybe hundreds."

"Wow."

"Yeah. Now we have to try to find them."

They sat in silence for a long time.

Riley hadn't asked about his eye, yet. He wanted to; Xander could see it in the way he kept glancing at it, moving his lips like he was searching for the words, and besides, who wouldn't? But Xander didn't have the heart to help him. It wasn't what mattered most. "Anya's dead."

Shock and then sympathy and then Riley was switching over to sit beside Xander, on his good side. "Damn. I'm sorry."

Xander nodded, proud of himself for saying it without his voice cracking. "Spike, too."

There was a beat of quiet, then, "I don't mind that so much."

"He saved the world."

Riley grunted, and it made Xander smile a little. Nice to have someone else hate Spike as much as him. Riley didn't even know about Buffy and Spike; Xander wondered what he'd say to that. "Kinda takes the shine off that time I saved it."

"Taking the chip out wasn't a mistake, then."

"There was some debate about that." Riley looked at him hard. "Nah. It was right." He didn't have to like it. "It was bad, Ri. I didn't think any of us were going to make it, this time. We could've all ended up at the bottom of that crater."

"You could've called me."

They should have. They owed him that. "Sorry. We've been kind of preoccupied."

He made a frustrated noise. "That's not what I meant. I'm just saying. I would've helped."

"Weren't any more rooms at the inn."

Riley frowned, but Xander didn't elaborate. Angel could've come too. A house full of slayers, and Riley and Angel could share a couch, while Buffy slept nights downstairs with Spike. Great idea.

In the gap, Xander realised Riley's hand was on his knee. It had landed there back with the offer to help, but it was still there. And Riley was staring at his own hand, like no power in the universe was going to get him to meet Xander's gaze as he did it.

Xander hadn't seen this coming. But seconds ticked by, and Xander hadn't pulled away or stuttered out any kind of excuse, and now Riley was leaning in, and Xander wondered how it would feel, kissing a guy. Riley. Buffy had seemed to like it.

His eye closed as dry lips touched his. Broader than Anya's. More hesitant than Anya's had ever been. The hand on Xander's leg was nothing like Anya's: heavy, huge, still.

Xander wanted to kiss him back. So he just did, let his lips part and close around Riley's, tasted the smooth, soft mouth. Something warmed, deep in his stomach.

He pulled back, lips tingling. "I wasn't expecting that."

Riley took a deep breath. "I wasn't planning it."

Neither of them spoke for a long time.

"So... were you hitting on me, or..."

"I really didn't have a plan." Riley pulled in, looking like he wanted to disappear. "You kissed back, right?"

"Yeah. I guess."

So what happened now? This didn't seem like the start of some great love affair. Of course, Anya hadn't seemed like that at the start, either. Xander looked over. Riley as the new love of his life? Probably not.

Fingers slid over Xander's cheek, skimming the patch. Finally. "Did this happen in the battle?"

"Nah. Before that. Message for Buffy."

Riley's eyes darkened, staring into Xander's. "A message?"

"More of a taunt, really."

The gentle hand drifted away, and from his one eye, Xander saw it make a fist. "Something did this to you to hurt her."

Xander shrugged. No one had ever said it that way, before, that emphasis.

"Will you get your sight back?"

"It's gone." One more hollow place.

Riley leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "Everything you've given up, Xander. You ever feel like you get anything back?"

Depended on the moment, how self-pitying Xander felt. How much stuff he'd bumped into that day, with the whole new added dimension to his clumsiness. But he'd pondered that one pretty hard, and he knew the answer. "The world. I'm pretty fond of the world not ending."

"Yeah," Riley said, not sounding totally convinced. "Thanks for that."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It wasn't hard to find Riley. With all the Council resources, the hardest part was skirting Giles, who thought the search was some sort of mission to annoy Buffy's new guy. It turned out Riley still had tabs on him, so all he'd really had to do was get a flight to Des Moines, and wait for Riley to show up at baggage claim.

Riley was waiting, like this was just another airport pick-up, not the first time they'd seen each other since 2003. They didn't speak as the luggage trundled past, until Xander grabbed his duffle and turned to him. He looked tired.

"My truck's in the lot." When they headed out, Xander noticed Riley's cane.

It was an old Ford that was equal parts rust and dents, the front seat filled with scraps of paper and tools. When they reached the exit from the lot, Riley asked, "You got a place to stay?"

"Nah."

Riley nodded, and headed right. It was just past sunset, still enough light to see the scenery pass, airport buildings then suburbs then bare Iowa countryside gradually giving way to darkness. It was just Riley and Xander in their own dark bubble.

Half an hour had passed, before Riley said, "I heard you spent some time in Africa."

"Yeah. Searching for slayers. You been there?" He could have been, Xander realised. Have dog tags, will travel.

"No. Not Africa. Spent some time in Asia."

Xander wondered if he was being general, like Xander always was about Africa, because he'd been pretty much all over, or if it was a classified thing. Or maybe he didn't want to talk about it. The cane rested on the seat between them, unmentioned. Xander wondered if Riley was going to be able to stay in the army. Who Riley would be without it.

Gravel crackled under the tyres as the truck slowed, and Xander perked up. But they weren't, well, anywhere. Riley turned off the ignition, and it was quieter than ever. Xander hadn't planned this part. He ran his sweaty palms over his jeans.

But Riley didn't say anything, and the hot engine ticked, and the headlights shone on a whole lot of nothing.

"So a snail walks into a bar."

Riley looked over. "Walks?"

"Slides."

"You're telling a joke?"

Yeah, he was telling a joke. "The snail slides into a bar, and asks for a beer. Barman says, 'We don't serve your kind 'round here,' and kicks him right out of the bar." Xander's leg swung, as well as it could in the footwell.

Riley just looked at him.

"Two years later, same snail slides back into the bar."

Riley rubbed a hand through his hair. "Snail says, 'What'd you do that for?'"

Xander wet his lips. "Yeah."

Riley stared out into the darkness for a minute, then at Xander, eyes gleaming with an intensity Xander had seen once before. And then Riley slid over and they were kissing, and this time Riley was inside him, and his hands weren't still.

Date: 2010-03-15 02:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lusciousxander.livejournal.com
I love it! It hurts my beating Xander heart. This exchange made my insides squeeze:

Fingers slid over Xander's cheek, skimming the patch. Finally. "Did this happen in the battle?"

"Nah. Before that. Message for Buffy."

Riley's eyes darkened, staring into Xander's. "A message?"

"More of a taunt, really."

The gentle hand drifted away, and from his one eye, Xander saw it make a fist. "Something did this to you to hurt her."

Xander shrugged. No one had ever said it that way, before, that emphasis.


I never really thought about Xander's injury in this light, but, shit, it's like a slap in the face to be hurt/used to hurt someone else. Reminds me of Buffy's sexy dance which was only done to make Angel jealous. Poor Xander.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Hey, luscious.

Yeah. It's not even a battle-wound: it's a totally meaningless act. Sidekick reduced to throwaway object, which, damn. Ouch. Xander Harris, this is your life.

Writing this made me wonder about Buffy: there was really no time to process it mid-apocalypse, but it must have been a hell of a thing to look at him and see that patch in the months afterwards. I want to write something with it, but I don't know what.

Thank you!

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 02:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jasonsnene.livejournal.com
Very nice. There just aren't enough Xander/Riley fics out there.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
So very true. It's been on my mind to write the pairing for a while, but I've never had the kick I needed. Yay for slashminis and allyndra.

Thank you, jasonsnene.

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 02:47 pm (UTC)
silentflux: (BtVS - Xander eating)
From: [personal profile] silentflux
I loved this :) The subtly of it, the comfort of it, the things left unsaid - just wonderfully done.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thanks, silentflux.

I love reading fics where all the communication falls in the gaps, but I've wandered away from writing it. It was nice to get back to this style.

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 03:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whichclothes.livejournal.com
This is wonderful. Kind of understated and sad, but hopeful at the end.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thanks, whichclothes. I'm hoping once they've got the sex working for them, they'll muddle through the actual talking stuff.

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 03:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 1-mad-squirrel.livejournal.com
You always give such damn good fic.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thanks, squirrel!

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 03:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bethynyc.livejournal.com
Awwww So sweet! I really like how caring Riley is on this, and Xander's answer to the question. Hey, I like the world too!

Thank you for writing this!

Date: 2010-03-17 09:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Hey, beth.

I think Riley's got just the right experience to appreciate the downside of being the guy in the background. Maybe the two of them (and Dawn) can form a union. World-lovers, tired of being expendable.

Thank you!

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 06:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brutti-ma-buoni.livejournal.com
This is lovely - understated and sweet, but also very, very funny and in character.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thanks, brutti!

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 06:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dharma-slut.livejournal.com
this is *good* writing, thanks!

Date: 2010-03-17 09:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thank you, dharma!

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 06:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dipenates.livejournal.com
This is lovely. Funny and sweet.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thanks, dipenates. Love your icon.

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 06:57 pm (UTC)
ext_19529: (buf || we all saw it coming)
From: [identity profile] inkandchocolate.livejournal.com
Here from [livejournal.com profile] maleslashminis

I really enjoyed this - you give good Xander!Thoughts. :) I've always had a soft spot for the Regular Guys in the Buffyverse. They'd be a great comfort to each other. And hot. Much with the hot.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Hey, inkanchocolate.

Me too. I love Xander and I'm a huge Riley-defender. Xander really got where Riley was coming from, when Buffy didn't, and I think it would be nice for Riley to come back and do the same for Xander. And then they could make wild buff-guy love. :-)

Thank you!

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 07:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brunettepet.livejournal.com
I loved this quiet piece. I liked the juxtaposition of Xander and Riley's scattered feelings and Xander having to piece together the past several hectic months in the first meeting with their near silent easiness in the second.

In the first scene it felt like Riley's hand on Xander's leg was anchoring them, pulling them together. In the second It feels like they've both come to a decision and that second kiss showed it's a decision shared. Xander and Riley feel solid and connected in the end, with Riley filling that hollow space in Xander. Nicely done.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Hey, brunettepet! Thank you.

I'm always fascinated by characters learning stuff we already know. (You may notice it comes up a lot in my fics.) Seeing reactions to big news, throwing new perspectives on old plot twists that other characters have already dealt with. And my god, how would they explain the second half of season seven to someone who wasn't there?

I kind of wanted to do the sex, but unfortunately it felt like the kiss at the end said everything that needed to be said. Alas, I'll have to find another excuse for Xander/Riley porn. :-)

Thanks!

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 08:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seadragonlady.livejournal.com
Simple, effective and very well written. There should be more Xander/Riley combos out here.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thank you, seadragonlady.

You are quite right. There isn't nearly enough Xander/Riley.

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 08:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mulder200.livejournal.com
I enjoyed this. It was bittersweet but ended with a touch of hope.

Date: 2010-03-17 09:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thanks, mulder!

S.

Date: 2010-03-15 11:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] electricalgwen.livejournal.com
"You're the only one who checked a crossbow."

I like the quietness in this, the understatement of the humor and grief and changes.

I love Riley's dry, "I don't mind that so much." :)

Date: 2010-03-17 09:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thank you! I feel like I've been writing a hell of a lot of babbly!Xander the last couple of years, so it was nice to play with his quiet side.

Yeah, I don't think Riley would lose a lot of sleep over Spike's death. Maybe at some point Xander could tell Riley about Giles and Wood's plan to off Spike, and Riley can go high-five them.

Thanks, gwen.

S.

Date: 2010-03-16 12:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] allyndra.livejournal.com
Oh my goodness, I love this so much! Thank you!

The voices are very well done. I especially appreciated the bit about Spike saving the world; I could easily imagine Xander and Riley saying exactly those things. And the lame joke at the end made me clap my hands in glee. So Xander.

This is wonderful! *holds it close*

Date: 2010-03-17 09:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Hooray, I'm so pleased you like it!

Yeah, Riley may have been strong enough to step back and let Buffy de-chip Spike, but he's never going to like the guy. And it was only writing this that I realised how much they didn't know: Xander didn't know Riley found out about Buffy and Spike. Riley has no idea about the attempted rape, or Spike and Anya... These two have so much more bonding to do. And I think they'll have a Spike dartboard in the basement.

Thank you for getting me to finally write Xander/Riley! I love them as a pair, but never got around to putting something together, before.

S.

Date: 2010-03-16 12:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wdlwbt.livejournal.com
I...You...Huh. OK. This was good! You and Whichclothes are confusing my happy OTP's, but I like it. Thanks:)

Date: 2010-03-17 10:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Obviously, Giles and Xander are the true destined pairing. But there can be happy alternative universes, where they enjoy Riley. Or Graham. Or hey, even better, maybe this is just a prequel, and in the distant future of this fic, they'll become a threesome with Giles.

Oh, that would be delicious...

S.

Date: 2010-03-16 12:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] delilah-joy.livejournal.com
Oh, wow, this is lovely. Affecting and believable and totally realistic. (I was going to say "understated," but I see about five other people have beat me to it.) I think the whole group of characters must have been sort of permanently damaged after Sunnydale, though that's not always reflected in post-Chosen fic. And the humor is great, but still somehow in keeping with the wistful overall tone.

Really nicely done!

Date: 2010-03-17 10:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
I feel like... one thing season seven set up is that they don't have each other anymore. It's something I dislike about that season: the core four is no longer a core. Xander and Buffy are tight at the start, but by halfway through, they've all got their own plots, and they turn away from each other to deal with them. Which magnifies the damage so much. It doesn't feel like they'll ever be what they were together.

There aren't a lot of people they could turn to, who'd understand, but Riley's one of them.

Thanks, delilah!

S.

Date: 2010-03-16 12:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] snogged.livejournal.com
Wonderfully done!
I loved what you did with this.

Date: 2010-03-17 10:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thanks, snogged. It took a while to figure out what to do with it, but in the end, it was all about the snail joke.

S.

Date: 2010-03-16 02:11 am (UTC)
katekat: (riley - glow)
From: [personal profile] katekat
ok, it's the last paragraph that absolutely kills me in all the best ways. There's something special about the mini form, where you can do this, start with all of these beginnings, and gesture towards the time that passes in real life, but then, in one fell swoop, give us something that opens up the future and ties it up all in a bow in two sentences and smooth words about two men who are not only the normal ones in the fight, but who get wounded from it. LOVELY.

Date: 2010-03-17 10:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Hey, Kate!

That's what I like about the mini-form, too: the ability to get away with great swathes of missing stuff. :-D

I like that this left me thinking about how much they have in common, and how much Xander doesn't realise that he's the stronger one of the pair. Mind you, Riley's arc was spectacularly hellish, and always seriously underplayed by the Riley-haters.

Thank you so much!

S.

Date: 2010-11-13 07:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sparrow2000.livejournal.com
I was puttering about at [livejournal.com profile] maleslashminis trying to find a fic that I could half remember, when I came across this story. I thought I'd read everything you'd ever written (including your shopping list *g*), but this one obviously sneaked under the wire in a stealthy, snail-like way, when I wasn't looking.

I have a huge secret kind for Xander/Riley and this was gorgeous.

"I can't be the only Alexander Harris on a plane these days."

"You're the only one who checked a crossbow."


Perfect voices, I can definitely hear and see them both saying those lines.

Loved the joke and as everyone else has said, the last paragraph is perfect.

Date: 2010-11-15 01:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Sparrow! Hello! Thank you!

I love Riley/Xander, had wanted to write the pairing for ages, but never found the hook. They had a really nice friendship going in the background, in that brief little season five window when Xander had an old-fashioned guy-friend.

I sort of let all my maleslashminis pieces slide quietly in, because I wasn't super-happy with any of them when I posted them, but I've become more pleased now I look back. It's funny how stories are like that.

My shopping lists, though... those are awesome.

S.

Date: 2012-02-28 08:20 am (UTC)
ext_9653: (Default)
From: [identity profile] pkoceres.livejournal.com
This makes me ridiculously happy! Love the two of them together, and as always, love your writing. :)

Date: 2012-02-28 12:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drsquidlove.livejournal.com
Thank you!

I love surprise feedback, especially when it pulls me back to re-read something I haven't read in ages.

Oh, Riley. I loved that guy. He and Xander would have been lovely together.

That is one seriously disturbing icon.

S.

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