Yep, and I think that's part of how the addict's brain works and I always loved that they got this part of Toby so spot on.
My ex was an ex-addict and he worked as a teacher in art workshops for recovering addict (a bit like Susan Fitzgerald did, except visual arts). And he told me some stuff that I thought were very insightful and made perfect sense: that the main reason lots of people do art is to get their fucking brain to switch off for 5 minutes, and that's why you get so many addicts (recovering or not) in arts, it gives a healthier mean to escape mundane life when it gets too much. And what's also typical of the addict's brain is the constant necessity to be chasing the next high. But when you do art, you're constantly chasing this idea of perfection/meaningfulness/whatev that you can never reach because as soon as you get better, you just want to reach the next stage, or try something different. So it's a neverending chase and a perfect substitute for dope.
And I think Toby gets the same substitute when working on law cases. Because chasing 'Justice' is even more of a neverending chase, LOL! And it's not so much about 'Justice' than the intellectual challenge itself. Toby's problem is that he's got this hyperactive brain, and when he's idle, he focuses inwards and goes on a loop obsessing about himself. You can see him feeling so focused and in control when he works on Keane's case, and that's true he's doing it more for himself than for Keane but so what? Probably my favorite scene in Oz (apart from B/K hotness ;) is Toby in Glynn's office after he got paroled, pleading for the inmate with the work injury and getting this CO sacked. You can really feel he's getting this intense high from doing it, that it's not at all about being noble or making amends, just the pure adrenaline rush. And that time it's not Keller or someone he has any emotional involvement with, it's some random guy, so the rush comes from the challenge itself. I think that's the scene we see Toby looking most on top of his game.
Groups like Sister Pete's, or any kind of talk therapy, they're useful as a safe place to vent but in the end, if that's the only type of therapy someone has, they've just spent yet another hour going on and on about the stuff that made them want to shoot up in the first place. That's why I always had a soft spot for Susan Fitzgerald, despite how imperfect she is. Sister Pete mostly gets on my nerves. IMHO, the problem with her and most mainstream shrinks, is that they think that someone having any kind of intense reaction to a situation (intense pain, intense anger) is the problem itself. This assumption is the basis of CBT therapy, that intense reactions are an aberration. Whereas art therapists, or the more political shrinks, they recognize that people may have very legitimate reasons to feel intense pain or anger, that the focus of the therapy should be more about helping them prevent these from getting out of control and causing them to do stupid things, and finding coping mechanism that are not self-destructive. And I think we see that in Sister Peter: she fails to recognize that Toby has a fucking good reason to feel like a victim, the problem is his coping mechanism only makes him less able to defend himself. And she heaps up the guilt instead of trying to help him find a way to maybe make his situation better.
LOL, you got me ranting on one of my pet obsessions, but I know you like your fics to spark debates ;)
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2015-01-17 02:53 pm (UTC)My ex was an ex-addict and he worked as a teacher in art workshops for recovering addict (a bit like Susan Fitzgerald did, except visual arts). And he told me some stuff that I thought were very insightful and made perfect sense: that the main reason lots of people do art is to get their fucking brain to switch off for 5 minutes, and that's why you get so many addicts (recovering or not) in arts, it gives a healthier mean to escape mundane life when it gets too much. And what's also typical of the addict's brain is the constant necessity to be chasing the next high. But when you do art, you're constantly chasing this idea of perfection/meaningfulness/whatev that you can never reach because as soon as you get better, you just want to reach the next stage, or try something different. So it's a neverending chase and a perfect substitute for dope.
And I think Toby gets the same substitute when working on law cases. Because chasing 'Justice' is even more of a neverending chase, LOL! And it's not so much about 'Justice' than the intellectual challenge itself. Toby's problem is that he's got this hyperactive brain, and when he's idle, he focuses inwards and goes on a loop obsessing about himself. You can see him feeling so focused and in control when he works on Keane's case, and that's true he's doing it more for himself than for Keane but so what? Probably my favorite scene in Oz (apart from B/K hotness ;) is Toby in Glynn's office after he got paroled, pleading for the inmate with the work injury and getting this CO sacked. You can really feel he's getting this intense high from doing it, that it's not at all about being noble or making amends, just the pure adrenaline rush. And that time it's not Keller or someone he has any emotional involvement with, it's some random guy, so the rush comes from the challenge itself. I think that's the scene we see Toby looking most on top of his game.
Groups like Sister Pete's, or any kind of talk therapy, they're useful as a safe place to vent but in the end, if that's the only type of therapy someone has, they've just spent yet another hour going on and on about the stuff that made them want to shoot up in the first place. That's why I always had a soft spot for Susan Fitzgerald, despite how imperfect she is. Sister Pete mostly gets on my nerves. IMHO, the problem with her and most mainstream shrinks, is that they think that someone having any kind of intense reaction to a situation (intense pain, intense anger) is the problem itself. This assumption is the basis of CBT therapy, that intense reactions are an aberration. Whereas art therapists, or the more political shrinks, they recognize that people may have very legitimate reasons to feel intense pain or anger, that the focus of the therapy should be more about helping them prevent these from getting out of control and causing them to do stupid things, and finding coping mechanism that are not self-destructive. And I think we see that in Sister Peter: she fails to recognize that Toby has a fucking good reason to feel like a victim, the problem is his coping mechanism only makes him less able to defend himself. And she heaps up the guilt instead of trying to help him find a way to maybe make his situation better.
LOL, you got me ranting on one of my pet obsessions, but I know you like your fics to spark debates ;)