drsquidlove

Someone Like You
by Dr Squidlove
drsquidlove @@@ livejournal.com

Oz/Law & Order: SVU crossover

Tobias Beecher's trying to rebuild his family in the shadow of the man he was in prison. Elliot Stabler's struggling to continue in the wake of divorce while his job eats away at his soul. It makes for an odd friendship, but it works.

Rated R for violence and explicit references to sexual violence.

Wordcount this post: 4070

Huge thanks to Elayna, from whom I sourced all my Thanksgiving cooking information. She was kind enough to give an incredibly detailed portrait of your weird Thanksgiving traditions, which, as you can tell, I have altered.

Full headers are on chapter 1.

Oz is the property of Tom Fontana and HBO. Law & Order: SVU is the property of Dick Wolf and NBC. The characters are used without permission, but with much appreciation.

Someone Like You
chapter 59: Thanks
by Dr Squidlove

Previously, in chapter 58, Stablers:
Elliot picked his kids and Olivia up from the train station, and made what turned out to be a superfluous speech about being nice.
The Stablers arrived. Everyone was awkward and shy, but Maureen and Kathleen were friendly to Holly and Harry, and that was enough for Toby, who was freshly realising this was his family now. And fretting about Harry, who still wasn't speaking to him. Kathleen stepped up to interrogate Toby, who was much more at ease with the probing questions than Elliot.
Elliot snapped green beans while watching the kids play in the snow and listening to Olivia talk out her thoughts on the future. He voted for the plan to have kids. Maureen joined them, and poked fun at Elliot for being too repressed to PDA on Toby, but this time, Elliot wasn't bothered.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Toby sat on the closed toilet, watching Elliot brush his teeth. It was warm upstairs, and Elliot had already stripped to his shorts for bed, all that smooth skin out for Toby's view, all the defined muscles of his shoulders and back down to the trim waist, the perfect shape of his ass. It was the first moment they'd had alone since Elliot brought everyone back from the train station, and Toby was happy to stare.

Elliot's kids had dug the board games out of the cupboard, and that had made the evening. Toby didn't know who'd been thoughtful enough to team him up with Harry and Maureen while he was off pouring drinks, but he was grateful. Elliot had the twins, and Olivia had been with Holly and Kathleen. Toby couldn't remember the last time he'd had that much fun, and even Harry hadn't been able to resist joining in, too caught up in the chase for points to worry about cold-shouldering his father.

Elliot leaned over the sink to spit and rinse, and then looked back at Toby. "Are you working up to saying something, or are you just watching my ass?"

"It's a great ass."

Elliot snorted, and threw his toothbrush back in his toiletries bag.

"Your kids are wonderful."

Elliot pretended he didn't glow a little at that, slouching back against the sink. "You handled Kathleen well."

"I'm a lawyer, remember?"

"I try to forget that."

"She'd be good in law."

"Over my dead body." He folded his arms. "I knew the two of you would get along."

"No, you didn't."

Elliot grinned. "I hadn't realised how alike you are. No filter."

"She knows it's easier when you lay it all out on the table." Toby and Kathleen knew where they stood, and it had been easy talking ever since.

Elliot rolled his eyes. It was cute.

"Dick and Lizzie are going to be harder." They answered direct questions politely enough, but didn't give more. Toby still didn't know whether it was shyness or resentment. His paltry attempts at conversation had awakened cloudy memories of trying to befriend Dino Ortolani on his first day in prison. Thank god for games night, when the twins' crazed competitive streaks outweighed their other issues.

"I think it helped that Maureen and Olivia both read everyone the riot act on the way here. And Harry's softening."

"Thanks to your kids. He doesn't like us yet, but he likes them." Toby shifted, and the lid creaked under him. "I overheard him talking to Dick." It felt strange calling him Dick, when Elliot had always called him Dickie, but Toby was going to get used to it.

"Do I want to ask?"

Toby wasn't going to give a word-for-word recap of the harsher comments. "Mostly they agreed this was all pretty lame." Dick blamed Elliot for walking out on Kathy. Harry had been raised to believe Gen was a saint, though he didn't mention the rude awakening that Holly gave him on his birthday. Dick didn't think Elliot knew how to be happy. He thought Elliot's bad temper would screw this relationship up as well, and he was worried how his mom was taking it. Harry didn't care if Toby was happy or not, but was pretty clear on one point. "Harry said men shouldn't be boyfriends."

"Toby..."

"Dick told him men can have boyfriends if they want. Did you know his best friend is gay?"

Elliot's eyes went wide. "Shane's gay?" Obviously not.

Toby shrugged. He hadn't caught a name. "And when Harry started with 'My Pop says-' Dick shut him down fast. He said, 'Old people all think it's the Depression and there's a war on and that things were better when kids were dying of smallpox instead of playing video games. Don't listen to anything old people say.'"

Elliot huffed. "Guess he's had another fight with Kathy's parents."

"He said there was nothing wrong with gay people. Unless it was you, having a mid-life crisis. He thinks you should buy a sports car and get over it." He couldn't help the smirk in his tone.

"I think we're a way past 'overheard' and well into 'eavesdropped'."

"Would you have walked away?"

Elliot grinned. "Hell no."

Toby stood and slipped his arms around Elliot's waist. "I think it's going to be okay."

"That'd be nice."

They kissed, easy and slow. Elliot tasted of mint. "But if you want a sports car..."

"What guy doesn't want a sports car?"

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Elliot could just make out the banging of pots and the kids' voices from downstairs: Maureen and Kathleen's short tones might have been an argument, but Lizzie's laughter told him everything was fine. As he listened Dickie stumbled past their door - he'd probably collapse on the couch down there and fall back to sleep.

It could have been a hundred other lazy mornings, but the body pressed against his back was hard and masculine, and there were fresh voices jumbled in below. Harry had plenty to say, and Holly piped up once. He thought he'd heard Olivia a while back.

Elliot twisted his head to see the clock. Their families were safe and happy, Toby was wrapped around him, and there was no rush to get anywhere, no job to drag him away.

Elliot reached back and trailed his fingers up Toby's thigh. Just one thing short of a perfect morning. A little firmer, a handful of ass got a sleepy 'Mmph,' and so Elliot's hand drifted forward and over the strong thigh, dipping between them to brush his fingers over Toby's soft cock and balls. They'd been distracted last night, slept naked. No wonder Elliot woke up horny.

He lasted all of thirty seconds before he had to watch, so he rolled over carefully and cupped Toby's hairy balls, let them sit in his hand and listened to Toby's breathing pick up.

Kathy used to get him hard with the way she wandered around in old cotton underwear, unselfconscious of how sexy she was. It was knowing the shape of her, the sensitive places, better than she did, that still turned him on after all those years. With Toby... Elliot was still figuring it out. It was the incredible lack of inhibition, the way he could leave all his history behind and revel in every touch. It was the way Toby could tease him past all his hesitation, make him see sex in ways he never had. It wasn't like Elliot had ever had any kind of favourable opinion of balls before, but now he loved the shape and weight of Toby's

He let them go and followed the trail of hair to Toby's navel, dipped a finger in and then laid his palm flat and headed north. Elliot's nipples didn't do much, but he'd figured out Toby's were incredibly sensitive. He had that much in common with Kathy. He just rolled them under his thumbs and Toby shifted, and his cock started to fill.

"C'mon, Toby. Morning," he murmured.

"El..."

"Yeah." There was still a tiny frisson of relief every time Toby called him by name when he was like this. He caught Toby's nipples between his fingers. "We've got a herd of kids downstairs, and if I don't hurry up and make you come so you can get down there and get the turkey in the oven, they're gonna wonder where we are."

"So do it." Half asleep, half awake, eyes still closed as a smile spread across his face.

Elliot was sure his kids wouldn't come barging in when Toby was in here, but Holly might. Kathleen would probably think it was funny to bang on the door. He reached down and circled Toby's cock in a loose grip. "I've been thinking."

"Mmmmm?" Toby rolled onto his back and let his legs sprawl wide, kicking the sheets away so Elliot could see everything, pushing his hips up into Elliot's slow, loose strokes.

"We've got a couple of days to ourselves up here after the kids go back to school."

"Yesssss..."

Elliot leaned close, dropped his voice. "I think maybe I could try it."

"What?"

Elliot kissed the base of his neck between his collarbones, the tip of his Adam's apple, the end of his unshaven chin. "Being inside you."

Toby's eyes popped open. "Yeah?"

He'd said it now, and Toby would look forward to it all weekend, and Elliot couldn't chicken out.

"You'll fuck me?"

Elliot tightened his grip, lengthened his strokes. "You want that?" The idea still unsettled him but he wanted to do something special. Toby wanted his trust? Elliot was going to trust him with this. He could at least try it once.

"Fuck, yes, El." Toby's hand curled around the back of Elliot's neck, pulled him closer until their foreheads touched. "Gonna be so close to you."

Toby's hips were moving fast and Elliot's cock was fit to burst. "Love you, Toby." He could say it now, and Toby looked glad instead of scared.

"Love you. Want to be full of you. Want you so deep inside me. Want to be on my back so I can watch your face as I squeeze down on all that beautiful fat cock."

Elliot barely caught his groan and Toby twitched, eyes closing and body pressing up, pressing up into Elliot's fist and catching his breath just a moment before come shot over his stomach. Toby lay gasping as Elliot reached for a tissue, but Elliot only managed one swipe before Toby had flipped him over and sucked his cock into that furnace of a mouth. Elliot's fingers scrabbled against the mattress; he wouldn't take long with-

Elliot jerked up at the banging on the door.

Toby didn't flinch, never even broke the suction, and Elliot flailed, trying and failing to push Toby off, searching for something to cover themselves in case someone barged in.

"Are you two going to get up today?" Olivia called.

"We're just getting dressed," Toby called back and dove all the way down Elliot's cock, and Elliot jammed his teeth together.

"Elliot too?"

Her tone made all the blood not in Elliot's cock rush to his face, but Toby pulled himself off and retorted, "Brushing his teeth," and lifted a finger to his lips in the universal sign for quiet. And then with a wicked look he licked it and pushed it against Elliot's ass.

Elliot choked on his moan, thrusting up for more of that eager mouth as the teasing finger followed, that light touch that made Elliot's nerves stand up.

He hoped it wasn't laughter he heard from the other side of the door, but he couldn't do anything about it, trapped in Toby's spell.

It went quiet at least; Olivia was gone. He hoped. Elliot scrunched his face as Toby twisted his finger just barely inside him.

"Don't know how you managed all those years with four kids."

Elliot didn't want to talk. "Kathy was never trying to embarrass me."

"Didn't she ever notice how hot you are when you squirm? Every time you cringed yesterday, I wanted to drag you upstairs and shove my hands in your pants."

"Shut up and suck me."

A warm breath of laughter over his cock and Toby did as he was told.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Elliot declared Uno and gloated at the barrage of insults from Maureen and Dickie. They were playing on the floor in front of the fire, since the table was already set for the meal. The smell of roasting turkey filled the house, and Elliot's mouth had been watering for hours. It finally felt like Thanksgiving.

A strange, alien Thanksgiving, in which Elliot had won Uno despite having his attention stuck on the man bustling around the kitchen, hair curling damply against his neck with sweat and steam. Elliot was going to penetrate him. It had been a spur of the moment promise, all the long-simmering fear suddenly giving way. Like that first kiss, he supposed. Except that first kiss had happened: Elliot felt Toby's mouth and he'd known it was right. This was just... looming.

Elliot was a little afraid and a little hard.

Toby and Holly jumped into a panic, searching through the kitchen for all of thirty seconds before Holly popped up with a wicked-looking carving knife. Just as quickly they were calm again, Holly trotting off to scoop up a bowl of steaming vegetables as Toby began to slice the turkey. Elliot could have watched him all day.

"Rematch!" demanded Dickie.

Olivia looked back over her shoulder to the kitchen. "Looks like our Thanksgiving dinner is ready. Why don't we help carry stuff to the table; Elliot can round up the others."

Elliot did has he was told, and climbed to his feet. Thanksgiving for twenty years had been at his house, or with Kathy's parents or sister, with familiar crockery and familiar traditions and familiar arguments. It was all different now, but it wasn't as unsettling as it could have been.

He found Elizabeth and Kathleen in the basement chatting, turning suddenly quiet and guilty as soon as Elliot came through the door. They didn't know where Harry was, so he just told them food was ready and left them to it. He climbed the stairs up to the bedrooms, almost called out when he heard Harry snap, "It's fine, Nan!"

Elliot slowed and listened.

"I don't want to."

The door was ajar, and he could hear everything.

"He isn't. It's not so bad."

A pause.

"No, they're cool. We had a snowball fight yesterday, and Dickie taught me how to play poker."

Elliot covered his eyes, waiting.

"We weren't gambling! No- Nan- Not with money! We were just playing. They're all right. Elliot's all right."

Elliot's eyebrows rose. He hadn't realised-

"But I don't want to come home." His voice rose, arguing over her. "You can't make me!"

Elliot let his hands curl. He wanted to storm in and yank the phone out of his hand, start making threats about custodial interference. It wasn't self-control that held him back, so much as wanting to hear Harry's response.

"And you lied about Mom," Harry snapped. "Yes, you did!"

Elliot leaned closer, wondering what that was about, and then realised he was half-crouched by the door, and eavesdropping probably wasn't the best way to earn Harry's trust. He forced himself forward and knocked, waited a moment and pushed the door open.

As soon as Harry saw him, he said, "I have to go. Lunch is ready." He frowned, impatient. "Dad made it. And Holly." Elliot started to leave, but Harry stood up, ready to follow. "I have to go. No- Nan!" He glared at the floor. "Okay. Bye." He dropped his phone on the bed.

"Everything okay?"

Harry shrugged as he passed Elliot in the doorway.

Elliot felt a lot more confident, now he'd heard himself defended. "I'm sorry you're caught in the middle of all this. Is there anything I can do to help?"

Harry looked back, just for a moment, and then shook his head. It was enough for Elliot to know he'd gained some ground. He'd give thanks for that.

They came downstairs to a table crammed with food, Kathleen filling a jug in the kitchen, everyone else in their seats but Toby and Holly, who were standing back, his hand on her shoulder, both looking a little awed by all they'd done.

"Toby, is this how you remember it?"

Toby glowed. "It's perfect."

Toby was perfect, and being this happy made him sexy as hell. Elliot nudged Harry to sit beside him, and took his own seat between Elizabeth and Olivia. "Chipped gravy boat?"

"Of course."

There were a few things not from Toby's childhood too, Elliot guessed. The couscous with apple and cranberries. The guests he'd known for twenty-four hours. The boyfriend.

As soon everyone was settled, Lizzie spoke up. "Do you want to say grace, Dad?"

"You can do it, honey." Elliot hesitated. This wasn't his Thanksgiving dinner, and he didn't know what Toby's traditions were. "Sorry, Toby, this isn't my-"

"Yes. It is." Toby shot him a significant look.

It was. Elliot wasn't a guest here: this was his Thanksgiving. Everyone staring at him right now was family. Elliot stared right back, and felt his world resettle.

"Go on, Liz," said Toby.

Lizzie said grace, and added, "I'm grateful that Olivia's head is better."

Olivia smiled, obviously touched. "Thank you. I'm grateful to be back on my feet."

They went around the table, each of Elliot's kids with something to be grateful for. Elliot added, "I'm glad everyone in my family is healthy and safe."

Holly jumped in without hesitation: "I'm grateful to have my Dad." Elliot's throat closed.

Harry looked down at the table. "I'm grateful for all my friends at home."

Toby was last. "Only one thing?"

In that moment, Elliot felt like he could read Toby's mind. Eight Thanksgivings in prison, one while he was still finding his feet on the outside, and now he was here: the table laden with food he and his daughter had cooked together. His son by his side. Freedom and a lover and the first family gathering that didn't feel like a parole review since he got out.

"Only one thing," said Kathleen.

"I'm grateful to have all of you here, sharing Thanksgiving with me. It's been a long time since a holiday felt like this."

Elliot wanted to pull him close, feel all that happiness in his arms. Their eyes met, and they smiled.

"Somebody pass the potatoes? No, the sweet potatoes."

"Can I have a leg?"

"Is that couscous?"

"Do you want the stuffing? Dad? Dad!"

Elliot blinked, and realised Liz was shoving a bowl at him. "Sorry. Thanks." The kids were way ahead of him filling their plates, and before he'd caught up, they were already praising Toby and Holly for the food. Holly was beaming, and Elliot could have hugged them all for being so gracious.

"What's this?"

"Warm artichoke salad."

"Okay." Liz passed it on, untouched, and reached for the corn instead. Elliot just took enough to be polite and gave it to Olivia, glad when she piled it on her plate. Elliot was here for the turkey and stuffing and sweet potatoes.

Maureen asked about the not-particularly-Thanksgiving dishes, which finally got Holly rambling about herbs and underrated vegetables as the twins listened in. Harry was very seriously explaining the rules of poker to Toby, and getting them at least mostly right. Olivia was devouring her dinner like she was on a one-meal-mission to regain all the weight she'd lost. Between her and Dickie, they might not have so many leftovers after all. Elliot poured a generous serve of gravy over his meal, and got eating.

The conversation bubbled all through dinner and into the pumpkin pie, which Toby and Holly had dressed up with a meringue topping that sucked up all the cinnamon and nutmeg into a fluffy cloud of sweet-spiciness. It was incredible.

"You, my friend," said Maureen, "are responsible for delaying my rendezvous with star command!"

"You! Are! A! Toyyyyy!" chorused the rest of the table, Holly and Harry included, and they all dissolved into giggles. At some point the kids had started quoting movies at each other.

Kathleen and Olivia were rubbing their swollen bellies but still eyeing the last piece of pie as Dickie claimed it.

"Dick!" Kathleen chided. "That's three slices!"

"So what? It's really good." He dropped it on his plate with a mutinous look and buried it under a pile of cream. "Yippee-ki-yay-"

"Dickie." Elliot was sure Dickie wouldn't dare finish that one at the dinner table, but he wasn't taking any chances.

Kathleen made a disgusted sound. "Have some manners, would you?"

"Enough, both of you." Elliot groused. This dinner had been damned near perfect; he wasn't going to let it be ruined by Kathleen and Dickie getting in one of their spats.

"I'm saving everyone else from eating too much." Dickie shovelled a huge forkful in his mouth with a triumphant look at Kathleen, and Elliot winced and rubbed his own belly. "I'm being altruistic," Dickie added, through a mouth full of pie.

Lizzie pointed a finger at him. "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

Elliot looked over the table. Everyone was done eating but Dickie, and they should probably think about clearing it. And doing something about the disaster in the kitchen. He ought to take charge, since Toby had led the cooking, but getting up seemed like the worst idea in the world.

"Dad, can we go to Blockbuster?"

Elliot stared at Lizzie. "Are you serious?"

"Harry's never seen The Princess Bride!"

"Liz, it's Thanksgiving!"

"No it isn't! It's Saturday. We drove past Blockbuster on the way here yesterday."

"I'm not driving to Blockbuster."

Toby and Olivia were grinning at his spluttering. Elliot was stuffed full and sleepy, he'd had three beers, and it was Thanksgiving. He wasn't driving anywhere.

"Maureen could," offered Dickie.

"Kathleen could," retorted Maureen.

Kathleen screwed up her nose. "I'm not driving anywhere."

Elliot sighed. "Maureen's had a beer and Kath-"

"And Kathleen doesn't care if she drives drunk," Dickie said.

"Dickie!"

Kathleen stared daggers at her brother. "Shut up!"

"We all know about it."

"Shut up, Dick!"

Toby looked sharply at Kathleen. "You were caught on a DUI?"

She sent a panicked glance at Elliot, but Elliot felt Toby's gaze too, coming to all the right conclusions. Elliot had never told him anything about it.

"It's none of your business," snapped Kathleen, when Elliot didn't speak up to defend her. "It's no big deal."

Elliot sucked in a breath. All that food sitting in his stomach started a slow roll. He braced himself for a speech, but Toby simply said, "Me too." His voice was light, like they were sharing a joke.

He had her attention. And Elliot's. The entire table had gone eerily quiet, sensing that it wasn't a joke at all.

Elliot's warning look was wasted. Please don't do this. Not today, Toby.

Toby's voice stayed mild. "What happened to you?"

She crossed her arms, her cheeks burning. Finally she said, "Nothing."

It was true. The way she'd looked at him in the police station, what she'd said - he hadn't had the heart to ground her afterwards. He'd always hoped the shock of a few hours in a cell would do the job.

Toby's eyes drifted to Elliot, and back to her. The corner of his mouth lifted. "Me too. I didn't have my father on the force, but I got myself a good lawyer, got it vacated. I was rich; it was pocket change." He shrugged, like it really was nothing, and the kids all stared at him, enthralled. "That was the first time. The second time was different."

Elliot's heartbeat slowed. He could hear every pulse. Couldn't do a thing to stop what was coming. It was all he could do to keep his turkey dinner from coming up.

"What happened the second time?" Maureen asked, but Toby kept his eyes on Kathleen, waiting for her.

Kathleen looked at her sister, pouted when she realised there was only one way to make Toby talk. "What happened?"

"I was charged with manslaughter."

Elliot had time to see that sink in on Kathleen, the seriousness of the charge and then the slow realisation that Toby killed someone. The colour left her cheeks. "You..."

"I killed a little girl. She was nine years old. I had to sit in court with her grieving parents. I went to prison. I destroyed my family." He leaned forward. "Your father shouldn't have got you off. Don't ever make him regret it."

No one spoke. Elliot couldn't look away from Kathleen, red eyes and ducked chin.

Long, silent minutes passed before Kathleen finally looked up through damp lashes. "What was her name? The little girl?"

Elliot had never thought to ask.

Toby swallowed. "Kathy."

Everyone looked at Elliot but Toby. He hadn't realised he'd made a sound. How had he never known that?

Toby glanced up, like he'd just realised everyone else was here. His gaze never made it to Elliot. "I'm sorry. I didn't... Fuck. I'm sorry." He was on his feet and halfway up the stairs before Elliot could take a breath.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

end chapter 59

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S.